Sunday, 26 May 2013

Here, let me just stick that in my vagina for you

In preparation for my upcoming fancy schmancy Endometrial Function Test, it feels like I am now sticking ALL THE THINGS into my vajayjay.  I wake up in the morning and promptly insert two Estrace tablets and an Endometrin progesterone tablet.  Mid-day I jam in another Endometrin, and just before bed (if there's any room left) I wedge another Endometrin and two more Estrace up there.  I feel like a clown car.  Or a body-packing drug mule.  Basically the only thing that's NOT going in my vagina lately is my husband's penis.  I can't blame him.  I wouldn't want a sludgy blue pee-pee either.

Also, can we talk about Endometrin?  I think I had the same reaction as Yeah,Science! when I read the box, which describes them as "effervescent vaginal tablets".  Soooo...like a sody pop in my vajeen?  Kind of made me wanna throw a bag of pop rocks up there and feel the magic happen.  I'm actually starting to wonder if the infertility patients of the world are the butt of some crazy RE bet to find the craziest thing they can get us to shove in our vaginas.

And then I told her to take it vaginally!!  HAHAHAHAHA!
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In non-vagina related medical griping news, does anyone else feel like their dentist is taking advantage of their dental coverage to do unnecessary stuff?  I had an appointment for a routine six-month cleaning earlier this week, at which time they announced that I was due for X-rays (it had been a year and a half since my last ones) and a checkup.  Did I mention that this was my first appointment since my employee dental coverage renewed itself in January?  During the checkup, the dentist mentioned several times about how good my teeth looked.  Then she kept picking, almost as if she was looking for a problem.  She eventually ended up telling me that there was one spot on an upper molar that looked "a little soft in the crevices" and could probably be a cavity at some point, so she recommended getting it filled now.  I went ahead and booked the appointment, but now I'm second guessing it.  Why would you fill something that isn't a cavity?  What if it doesn't turn into one?  What if I end up having a horrible dental emergency later this year and can't afford to get anything done because my dentist's office is running up my coverage bill just because they can?  I certainly don't think all dentists are like this, but this place has been recommending braces to me ever since I moved to Toronto because of two slightly mis-aligned lower teeth.  Teeth that no one sees and aren't causing me any problems.  So I'm skeptical of their motives.
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Thanks to everyone for all your dog advice after my last post.  Things have started looking up in Buddy-land.  We've started leaving the TV on when we leave in the morning (thanks Amanda!) and doing some sensitization training for separation anxiety.  Friday we came home to no poop and minimal barking, so we may be making some progress.  I guess we'll see how tomorrow goes after us being around him all weekend...hopefully not one step forward, two steps back!  I think Buddy's definitely starting to settle into the routine around here, though.  Last night he got sick of waiting for M and I to go to bed, so he went upstairs all by himself and tucked himself into his dog bed in our room.  Pretty dang cute!

13 comments:

  1. Okay, I only had to stick one Estrace tablet up there in the morning and one in the evening (in addition to the 3 orally). I can't imagine sticking FOUR of those suckers up there! You must be feeling pretty smurftastic about now. Not to mention the Endometrin. I bet your vayjay is loving you about now. Hopefully it will all be worth it in the end.

    I don't know what to tell you about the dentist, except why the heck would you be getting a filling for a non-cavity? I would question that too.

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  2. I feel like you read my mind, except you're funnier:-) I just told my husband that if someone told high school girls that there's a chance their lady parts would be used to absorb medicine, they might think twice about the ol' sex thing. At the moment, I'm only ramming progesterone suppositories up there two times a day, but jeeze!

    It maybe TMI, but I had to sort of "sneak" in sex. Can't do it in the morning or evening because my vagina has an appointment with a suppository. LOL! Turns out the sneaking may have been a bad idea. I may not revisit it.

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  3. Hahahaha... I love your caption for that photo! And seriously, yes to feeling like a Colombian drug mule. It got to the point where I just assumed that every prescription I filled was meant to go up my vagina unless they told me otherwise. The funniest, though, was when I called the nurse to ask about the "take with food" directions on the Estrace bottle and she said, "Oh no, don't go putting any food up there!" Like I was some crazy person obsessed with storing sandwiches in my body cavity just to save space in my purse or something...

    Is it weird that I'm so excited for your EFT?

    Also, just had a dentist appt. this morning -- I don't have coverage at all, so I basically decline everything as a basic cleaning is $174 out of my pocket. I can't even tell you how great it felt to say "I CAN'T DO X-RAYS BECAUSE I'M PREGNANT, SUCKAHS!!!"... well, minus the suckahs part. :)

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  4. You poor thing! That sucks having to shove all that crap up there, Ugh! Hope you having a nice, relaxing weekend.

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  5. Oh my Lord! That's a lot of endometrin!!! You poor thing!! That stuff is the WORST!

    I hope Buddy continues to take steps forward and that you don't have any more episodes with him - he sounds like such a lovable little guy :)

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  6. Wow. I am really missing out in the whole shove-stuff-up-your-vag department. Now I'm gonna have to double check my Estrace prescription for this upcoming IVF to make sure the pills go in my mouth!

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  7. Hehe.. My friend calls estrace sex, smurf sex.

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  8. Your posts always make me laugh. Thanks for cheering up a rainy, dreary day!

    So listen, I think the dentist thing is a total conspiracy - fueled mostly by the fact that my dentist drives a Jaguar convertible with vanity plates that say "Toothfxr" (true story). Anyway, he told me I needed a root canal and I was like, OK, yeah, I will totally call and schedule that... 6 months later at my regular cleaning, that tooth was magically downgraded to a "wait and see." That was over a year ago. I don't know much about oral health, but I do know that I can't afford to make other people's Jag payments. If it doesn't cause you pain... I say wait. And come on, my advice has been working out so well for you so far.

    Amazingly, I haven't had the pleasure of a single vaginal prescription yet. Sounds like I'm really missing out.

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    1. Your advice is clearly impeccable. I canceled the appointment.

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  9. I missed out on the blue vag pills somehow. The only ones I had were sort of off-white. Hope it's all worth it because that is a lot of stuff to be putting up there.

    um, I would definitely question the dentist. Why would you fill something that might or might or might not turn into a cavity? As long as you go for cleanings regularly, they can keep an eye on it and fill it if/when necessary.

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  10. Awesome photo (and caption)! And I'm glad to hear that things are looking up with Buddy. :)

    Here are my thoughts about the dentist thing, in case you're interested: (Full disclosure: I'm married to a dentist.)

    It is certainly true that some dentists are shifty characters trying to make a fortune off of their patients. If you are suspicious of this, perhaps you could get a second opinion?

    If you want to give your dentist the benefit of the doubt, it's true that there are some legitimate reasons for being more aggressive about filling early cavities...

    My husband is a pediatric dentist at a high-end practice with lots of helicopter parents, and he often says that he has the luxury of being able to be conservative about treatment plans, since he knows that (a) the parents will actually do what he advises in terms of hygiene/prevention, and (b) the patient will actually come back in 6 months, at which point he can intervene if things are starting to go downhill - or he can again 'wait and see' with confidence that he will actually see them again soon.

    On the other hand, during his residency, he was seeing low income, high-risk patients with low dental IQ, and who would probably not go back to a dentist again until things became painful. In that case, he felt obliged to be super aggressive and fill EVERYTHING (including stains or other almost-cavities), because the next time any dentist might see it, it would be an infected mess in need of a root canal or extraction...

    Obviously, you don't fall into that latter category, but if your dentist doesn't know you that well, or if her patient population includes lots of at-risk or non-compliant folks, or if she was trained in a place tailored to at-risk/non-compliant folks, her recommendation might be understandable.

    Either way, if I were you, I'd probably get a second opinion, and see if I couldn't find another dentist whose recommendations I trusted. At minimum, you can always cancel the appointment and tell her you'd prefer to wait and see until your next scheduled cleaning...

    I'm sorry you have to deal with this!

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    1. Thanks! This comment actually helped me to decide to go ahead and cancel the filling. I'm already scheduled in for my next cleaning in six months, so they can look at it again at that point. I've always had deep crevices in my teeth and yet have managed to have remarkably few cavities in my time, so I'll just hold off for now.

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  11. Hello, just found your blog as a recommendation from Yeah, Science! because you are a fellow 416 person. My dentist also made me fill in a non-cavity last year when I went. I know it has been there as a hole for a while... but I let her do it anyway... that way i can still say I don't have any cavities. :)

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I'm needy and your comments validate me. Help a sister out!