Monday, 14 January 2013

Slow your roll, Fatty

Well, I've now officially gotten further in this cycle than I did last time we tried IVF.  Last time I was cancelled after 7 days of stims, with one huge dominant follicle and four smaller ones.  This time, after 7 days of stims, I have one huge dominant follicle and four smaller ones.  Sound familiar?  However, this time we're going for two more days of stims before my next check.  I guess it's safe to say that expectations for me have dropped.

I was pretty happy to hear this morning that I had two new follicles in the mix, bringing my grand total up to five.  But the bad news is that there's a monster follicle on the left that's taken a substantial lead at 17mm, with all the rest lagging at 10 or 11mm.  The nurse said that it's likely they'll just continue to stim me and possibly sacrifice the big one by allowing it to overmature so that they can get at the crop of little ones. 

I have mixed feelings about this.  Obviously, IVF is a numbers game and the more follicles at retrieval the higher our chances of success.  But theoretically, Fatty McFatterson (as I'm now calling my 17mm follicle) is my best egg since it's growing the fastest.  It kind of sucks to sacrifice it for the sake of the lesser mini-eggs.  

Mmmm....Cadbury mini eggs....sorry, got distracted there for a bit.

They didn't even bother to give me my E2 level, which is probably good since I would've only researched and obsessed about it all day.  As it is, I feel like I'm on pins and needles all the time.  Every morning before my stim check I wake up with a huge ball of anxiety in my stomach, wondering if we'll be told we're cancelled again.  Then I get to work and try in vain to distract myself before I get my afternoon bloodwork results and drug instructions.  Then the whole cycle repeats itself.  I feel like I'm just scraping through the checks by the skin of my teeth, and I wish just for once that I'd get some kind of results that I can feel confident in.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go drink some wine and give a rousing pep talk to my remaining follicles.

22 comments:

  1. Fingers and toes crossed for you!!

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  2. Layperson's opinion here, but it sounds like the plan they have for you is the pretty solid. I hope those smaller follicles grow and give you a nice "batch" for a retrieval.

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  3. thinking of you and drink away. whatever you need to do to past the time

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  4. Well done for getting further than your last cycle! And for recruiting two new follicles! And only a few more months before Cadbury mini-eggs! Go ovaries!!

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    1. Actually, most stores around me tend to carry them all year now. Which is very dangerous. We actually had a bit of a bird theme at our wedding and used mini-eggs in little nests as our favours. In hindsight, I shouldn't have been giving away my eggs.

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  5. Hey, you've gotten further than last time--that's great. I know it feels like deja vu, but they seem to be taking a different approach this time. Give those little eggs a chance. I know what you mean about being on pins and needles, though, and that feeling sucks. Sending you hugs.

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  6. I agree with your clinic in letting go of the big one, which not necessarily mean is your best one, most of the time slow growth is a really good thing, slowly but surely.

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  7. That one is really ahead of the pack! I think it sounds like a good idea to potentially let that one go in the interest of getting more eggs. It's better than having to cancel the cycle! When my sister was cycling as our egg donor, she also had one ahead of the others, and we were advised to let that one go in order to get more eggs. As it turned out, the others caught up to it and it ended up being okay. I don't know if that will happen for you, but I have my fingers crossed! Good luck!!!!!!

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    1. It's always good to hear some success stories, thanks Amber!

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  8. Hoping for you! I tend to agree with the clinic - a crop of slower growing eggs gives you so much more to work with. As long as they get up the right measurements, the slowness is fine!

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    1. Fundamentally I have no problem with the slowness. It's Fatty that's worrying me. I am fully expecting to go into my next monitoring appointment and find Fatty at 21mm and the rest still hanging out at 10. Fatty's eating all their drugs! They're starving!!

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  9. I sort of wish they had done that on my first cycle - let the big one go and wait for the smaller ones to catch up. Instead they went for the big one and I only had that one mature egg. Sounds like the clinic is doing all they can to make this cycle work.
    Also, I sometimes call my cat Fatty McFatterson because, well, she is fat.

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    1. Heh. This made me chuckle. And for that, I thank you!

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  10. Omg you know those Cadbury Creme Eggs that came out around Halloween and were rebranded as Cadbury Scream Eggs? That's what you should call your dominant follicle... I kind of think it's worth sacrificing Scream Egg, though, and trying to focus on the Mini-Eggs. You also can never be sure what's going to happen -- maybe the big one will reach 2.0 and then just hang out for another few days without getting bigger or over-ripening, and then the others will catch up. I do agree with you about the frustration, though -- I really expected that this different protocol would actually work to PREVENT what happened last time. Ugh.

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    1. Ugh my sister loves them, but I totally can't handle Creme Eggs. I like sweet, but those are just pure egg-coloured sugar. LOVE the name Scream Egg. Fatty McFatterson, I dub thee the Scream Egg!

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  11. Come on smaller follicles!! I know that you are bummed about giving up on the largest one, but maybe slower growth is better?

    Crossing my fingers for you!

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