Wednesday, 2 January 2013

Workin' it out

Happy New Year, friends in fetus-making!  

We got 2013 off to a pretty chill start, hosting two other couples for dinner at our place and ringing in the new year with good wine and non-shouted conversation.  I couldn't be happier to say goodbye to the days of paying ridiculous cover charges to overcrowded bars, skittering around icy streets in heels while attempting to flag down the only cab that's passed by in the last half hour.  "$30 cover?  Are you freaking kidding me?  Oh, you mean I get a crappy noisemaker that'll break in ten minutes, plus the joy of being crushed against a bar while waiting forever for a vodka and soda?  Well, why didn't you say so!  Let me in!"  

We're becoming such oldsters.

As my post title suggests, I've also started a new workout regimen.  Given my 8 months of fitness stagnation in 2012, I've decided to ease back into things with some at-home DVD workouts. This will allow me to keep things pretty light while we go through our January IVF cycle, but will also give me a good enough fitness base to ramp it up into some outdoor running this spring if I'm still not pregnant.  I actually have to remind myself not to push too hard, since I tend to have an over-inflated sense of how fit I actually am.  I remember back to when I used to run all the time (5k every day, 10k on the weekends for fun!) and just can't believe I'm not that person anymore.  

But that person also had a very all-or-nothing approach to living healthfully.  Being "on" meant working out every day and following a regimented eating program that included keeping a food diary, weighing and measuring everything I ate, budgeting my 1500 to 1700 calories per day and never going over except on designated cheat days.  Being "off" meant that eating something forbidden or skipping a workout ruined my whole fitness regimen, so I should just not work out at all and eat as much crap as I wanted.  While I never struggled with an actual eating disorder, I definitely had an unhealthy relationship with food and exercise that emphasized perfection and left no room for flexibility or listening to my body's cues.  I've worked a lot on this but I can still fall back into these old habits pretty easily, and the stress of 2012 was definitely a big trigger for me.  I was "off" pretty much all year, and since I wasn't eating terribly well I figured there was no point in working out.  Yep, it's that dumb.

Luckily, it turns out that babymaking is the perfect motivation to pull my head out of my ass!  During an IVF cycle you're supposed to do light exercise and eat healthy (but not diet), which means it's totally counter-productive for me to become fixated on calorie counting or crunching my way to 6-pack abs (yeah, like that's ever happened).   Case in point: yesterday I ate well, worked out, and after dinner ate a leftover cupcake from New Year's Eve.  Today, instead of viewing myself as a complete failure and giving up, I ate well and worked out again.  Revolutionary!!  I mean, I know this is basic logic to a lot of people, but for me it's a pretty big deal.

Anyway, this post became a lot more personal than I originally intended it to be.  It's actually probably good for me to get it out there, since the practice of writing about my all-or-nothing attitude just helps reinforce how ridiculous it is.  And now I'm accountable if I start slipping back into it again.  Although with any luck, the next time I'll need to deal with this issue is when I have 20 to 30 pounds of baby weight to lose!

14 comments:

  1. I know what you mean about the unhealthy relationship with food. I'm usually an all or nothing too. Although, it's been very easy for me since I became pregnant. Now I have absolutley no desire to eat bad because there is no way I'm going to risk an unhealthy pregnancy.

    Good luck with everything!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks. Here's hoping I end up with the same healthy food motivation that you have!

      Delete
  2. Whoa, a 10K just for fun?! It took me MONTHS of training to finally be able to run the Sporting Life 10K and, when I finally did it (in under an hour, yay!), I basically stopped running altogether. Realized I just don't like running after all. Now I'm really struggling to exercise, what with the cold weather... desperately trying to organize squash games and going to a yoga class every other week, but I am pretty worried this ain't good for the bod.

    Totally with you on NYE crap, too -- said goodbye to those douchebag clubbing nights AGES ago. :) Sorry, David Guetta.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yup, 10k for fun. Nice relaxing long run on the weekend, nice tree-lined path by a river...of course now I would vomit at the 2k point. 10k in under an hour is great!! I trained forever to get to that point.

      Delete
  3. You totally just described my husband. He used to be a runner like that, then hurt his back and is having a hard time just starting a more moderate exercise program. He thinks if it isn't super intense it isn't really exercise so lately he hasn't been doing anything. He certainly doesn't consider my yoga or pilates "real" exercise. Congrats on getting back into working out. I haven't gotten to that resolution yet.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yoga and pilates are TOTALLY real exercise. They hurt me so bad...I'm super inflexible and yoga is just an hour of pain, no relaxation to be had at all! I always wonder how people do it.

      Delete
  4. For the 5 minutes I was pregnant, I had impeccable eating habits and kept track of all my calories and exercise on my phone app. My first splurge after the MC was a king sized kit-kat bar and then I started eating Christmas cookies at work...I've been on a break from swimming and without exercise I haven't tracked any foods. I've never realised I've had such an all or nothing approach too! Best wishes with your efforts! Love the term 'fetus-making friends'!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tee hee...thanks! Yeah, I think you're entitled to some mega-chocolate consumption after an MC, totally guilt-free.

      Delete
  5. I'm with you in trying to amp up my exercise quotient to something respectable. IF is a super excuse for me to avoid exercise. But as of last month I've been boot camping it up. I kind of love it and kind of hate it all at the same time. I'm hoping it shifts more into a love it thing as time passes.

    Happy new year!

    PS) I love the term fetus making friends too. Awesome!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would love to try a boot camp, but they're all so early in the morning and I'm just NOT a morning workout person. I'm sure you'll love it eventually!

      Delete
  6. My husband is a runner, I am not. Unfortunate for me because I live in the most perfect place to run year round: beach is a block away, flat and paved running paths, dolphins frolicking in the ocean to keep you company. All that, and I'd much rather eat a twinkie. No, I do go on long walks with the pooch though (and then come home and eat a twinkie). It's a hard balance to eat right, exercise and still enjoy life. I'm glad to hear you are starting to navigate that path.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's the worst part about running in Canada...you can get in such a great groove in the spring/summer/fall and then it sucks trying to slog it out through slush and snow in the winter.

      I would totally take up running again if there were dolphins along the way!

      Delete
  7. We hung out at a friend's house for NYE and it was fantastic. My ears didn't ring the next day, I didn't smell like smoke/spilled beer/wine/mixed drinks, and I could actually have conversations with my friends.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Huh, I think I've been an oldster my whole life.

    I, too, have a tendency to be all or nothing when it comes to exercising and eating right. I'm super hard on myself if I slip up, but then I just think, "screw it," and go crazy. You'd think IVF would be enough motivation to get me on a better track, but it doesn't seem to be working so far. Sounds like you're doing awesome, though!

    ReplyDelete

I'm needy and your comments validate me. Help a sister out!