Thighlights

I consider myself a pretty average girl (yes, I have a problem using the word "woman" when referring to myself).  Statistically, I'm as average as you get.  Average height, average weight, average shoe size...average everything. 

In that case, can someone please please explain to me why I am consistently busting out of the inner thighs of my pants???

Today I got home from work and when changing my pants I noticed a two-inch rip on the left inner thigh, right up by the crotch.  Luckily the tear was situated in such a place that I highly doubt anyone would have been able to notice it even when I was walking around, but did I mention that these are my ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE WORK PANTS IN ALL THE WORLD?

We all have our own problems when buying pants.  My legs are kind of short for my height, so finding pants that don't need to be hemmed is a big deal.  I also love pants that minimize my slightly poochy lower belly while accentuating my pancake of a butt.  Finding a pair of pants that can do all of these things at the same time is like searching for life on other planets...theoretically you know that there's probably something out there, but you have to look really really hard to find it.

I found my dream pants at a J. Crew outlet in Maine.  Navy blue cotton with a slight stretch to it, with a nice flat front and enough of a back pocket to give me the illusion of a booty.  Vanity sizing meant that I fit into a size at least two sizes smaller than I normally wear.  Yeah, I know it's fake and shallow...I'm so weak!  I loved them so much I searched high and low for more pairs in other colours, only to be disappointed until I went back to the exact same outlet two years later and bought them in black and beige.  But the navy was my first, and they always held a special place in my heart...and closet.  Until today.

There was no way to salvage them, since the tear wasn't on a seam or anywhere I could mend it.  What I can't figure out is why this always happens to me!  Usually it's jeans though, where I get this lovely thinned-out fabric window like you get on the bottom of worn out socks.  This is the first pair of work pants that my apparently oversized and sandpaper-like thighs have rubbed a hole through, though.  I guess I'm lucky I haven't started a fire down there with the friction that my thunder thighs have been wreaking on my poor unsuspecting pants.  And the worst part?  I can't find the uber-pants online.  They apparently exist only in the outlets.

Am I the only one with this problem?  I find this hard to believe, given my aforementioned average-ness, and I really don't think that my thighs are any different from most everyone else.  But I've never heard anyone else mention this happening to them.  So is it really just me?  Do I need to go on a thigh-et?  (HAH!  Terrible joke).